What are the studio rules?
At Anatomie we believe creating safer spaces is best achieved with culture setting rather than policing and hard rules. For this reason, we have very few rules in the space – as long as activities are done with consent of those involved and with respect for the space and the environment around you, then we are happy for you to carry on. There is only one thing to remember here: Consent is Queen in the studio.
It might seem like an easy concept, but in fact sometimes it can be tricky to navigate consent in sex-positive spaces (and there is no shame in being new and having to learn about it!) – so we’ve put together some simple ways to explain how this might look in the studio.
1 – Giving Space
When people are tying, whether solo or with others, give them plenty of space for their ‘scene.’ If you would like to watch, keep to a reasonable distance and be unintrusive. In particular do not interrupt a scene to ask questions, touch people or their equipment (rope included).
2 – Touching
Give and receive enthusiastic, active consent for activities and any kind of touching. We call these conversations ‘negotiation’.
Here are some tips:
– Both parties must be informed of the activity’s risks before consenting
– Ask what is okay and not okay
– Clearly state what you like and dislike
– When in doubt, don’t do the thing
– Respect “no” (“no” is a complete sentence). Silence is not consent, freezing is not consent.
– Mixed messages mean “no.”
3 – Using the Suspension Points
Use of the points is reserved for experienced people. If you see people suspending, they have very likely completed our courses or have received tuition here or elsewhere. Suspension is edge play. It is risky. Do not endanger yourself or others by suspending before you are ready. Respect when the owners or staff ask you to stop suspending. Come ask us about classes if you’d like to learn!
What exactly is consent?
Consent is clear, communicated, enthusiastic, the initiator’s responsibility and can be renegotiated or withheld at any time.
This means listening to each other, respecting each other and being mindful of all our interactions. Practicing consent is an important step in creating a culture we want to live in; a culture in which people are respected and have the autonomy to decide what is best for them.
We support and encourage folks to explore rope in safe, exciting, consensual ways. While doing this it is incredibly important to discuss safety, boundaries and care. Everyone deserves boundaries and safety when and if they choose to engage in rope. Your first partner is you. Knowing and exploring our boundaries is a lifelong conversation with ourselves.
>> Consent C.A.R.E.S. <<
No one is responsible for fulfilling our wants but ourselves. Wants consist of the things that we enjoy doing and give us pleasure (in the broadest sense of the word). While it can be exciting and empowering to share these things with others, other people are never responsible for fulfilling your wants.
C.annot be held to a predetermined agreement
Consent is not a contract; people can change their minds.
A.greement that is mutually communicated
Listen and pay attention to words, feelings, and context. Respect indecision (it is not a yes). Mixed messages mean “no.”
R.esponsibility of the initiator
The person wishing to initiate an act or change an act is responsible for initiating the conversation about consent. This might include initiating a rope scene, touching different body parts, or transitioning from tying to touching.
Is your partner enthusiastic verbally and physically? Check in. If you have doubts, don’t proceed.
Especially when transitioning from one activity to another, consent can be renegotiated or withheld at any time. Check in every step of the way.
In addition, we at Anatomie Studio is deeply committed to practicing the following values:
- Consent: see here for a clear explanation of what this means
- Sex/Kink-positivity: as a broad ideology and world view, sex positivity is simply the idea that all sexual expression (as long as it is healthy and explicitly consensual) is a positive thing
- Body-positivity: being body positive means accepting yourself and others as you are, regardless of size, shape, colour etc and to be unafraid of being visible – i.e. the opposite of ‘body shaming’
- Diversity, Inclusion & Tolerance: we welcome LGBT+ participants and anyone from any sexual orientation, background, religion or creed. ALL are welcome.
We thank our friends, house cats and all our attendees for helping us uphold these values every day, and to all of those who continue to help us make the space ever more inclusive and welcoming.